Getting Past I Can't

     Getting past thinking I can't do certain yoga poses has been both challenging and rewarding. Why do we tell ourselves we can't do something? In my practice I can't has been based on fear.  Fear of failure, fear of not being good enough, fear of injury, fear of falling, and fear of the pose itself.
     During these first two weeks of teacher training I have become aware of the things I tell myself I can't do and how they are holding me back.  I had been telling myself I can't do a handstand because I have wrist problems, instead of looking for ways to work with my wrist problems.  My teachers have been encouraging me to simply try.  This meant doing the prep work for the pose, getting comfortable with that, strengthening where I needed to strengthen, become confident in my alignment, and finally attempting to get into a handstand with out judging myself if I didn't get all the way up.  After a few days I was able to get my feet up! Then my work became staying up. There is always something else to work on in a pose.
     Practicing in this way brought my attention to the fact that telling myself I can't do something was not serving me.  In reality it was doing quite opposite, it was stoping me from growing and exploring new possibilities.  This has also made me look at the reasons why I was telling myself I couldn't do something.  It was all about fear.  I was afraid I would not do a pose well or I would fail.  It is better to try and fall or try and not be perfect than to have never tried at all.
     Having this new insight into my practice has had quite an impact on the way a practice.  I have a new willingness to explore and try new things.  It is not about being able to do the pose perfectly right away but about trying new things and working on making them better.
     With this new attitude I was able to start practicing a pose I thought I would never be able to do Urdhva Dhanurasana/Wheel Pose.  I started out with putting my hands down behind my head, then working on the action of lifting up, then when I had enough space getting my head onto the ground, then using the strength in my arms to lift up.  I am sure I didn't achieve the most beautiful Urdhva Dhanurasana ever but I brought a new pose into my practice that I can practice and slowly get better at.
     I am now stepping onto my mat with a new openness to try.  I can try new poses and work on the set up so one day when I am strong enough or open enough to do the pose I will be able to.  But until that happens I will be content working on getting there.  Yoga poses are not a destination they are a journey.  On that journey we learn a great deal about ourselves both on and off of the mat.  Don't let I can't get in the way of your journey.

How I Got Here

Hi!
     My name is Ali Snapp and I grew up in Los Osos, Ca. A small beach town on the central coast.  I grew up playing sports and being very active.  I played soccer quite competitively for four year and ran track in high school.  Two broken feet, ruptured calf muscle, severe spinal lordosis, patella-femoral syndrom and three broken fingers later I got to the point where I could no longer do the things I was use to doing.  This was devastating. I didn't know how I could be active while dealing with these injuries and the healing of theses injuries. At one point it was difficult to walk very far and stand for extended periods of time.  So I did my best with the injuries I was dealing with.
     I found yoga in an odd way, through my job.  I was hired to work at a yoga studio and sell yoga memberships and help students find the right classes and guide them along in their yoga journey.  I had heard about yoga but had never tried it.  I was under the impression I needed to be flexible inorder to do yoga.  Therefore, I was very nervous about starting a practice.  I was blessed to have kind and understanding teachers from the beginning.   They put me at ease and taught me to accept where I am.  They told me yoga is a practice and every day will be different.
     This was a big shift for me as a former athlete.  I had to shift from the mentality of I want to win to a mentality of I am here.  I could not look at a pose like a soccer game or a race I wanted to win.  Yes a pose has a point of full extension but it can't be viewed the same as winning a race or a game.  I had to come to terms with the idea it may take me years to fully extend through a pose and I may never get there but that is not what it is about.  Furthermore, once I have attained full extension within a pose there is still more I can work in while I am holding the pose.  I had to come to realize yoga is about being present in the moment and accepting where you are and being ok with that.  Knowing that we are ok just the way we are.  Yoga is a journey not a destination.
     I am honored to share this journey with you and would enjoy and appreciate any comments or personal stories you would like to share.

Namaste